Thusnelda von Hess, née Hudtwalcker
July 8, 1781, Hamburg – May 2, 1866, Hamburg
Wife of the writer, topographer, politician, and Enlightenment thinker Jonas Ludwig von Hess (1756–1823), Old Hamburg Memorial Cemetery. Tomb slab: "Freedom Fighters".
Thusnelda von Hess, the sixth child of Elisabeth Hudtwalcker, is immortalized as the wife of Dr. Jonas Ludwig von Hess on the tomb slab "Freedom Fighters 1813, 1814, 1815" at the Old Hamburg Memorial Cemetery. Following his passing, the latter was interred in one of the Dammtor cemeteries. Today, his gravestone stands in the Hedge Garden Museum. The "Freedom Fighters" tomb slab at the Old Hamburg Memorial Cemetery was erected in honor of Jonas Ludwig von Hess and others.
On November 25, 1805, Thusnelda Hudtwalcker married the scholar, who was twenty-five years her senior, after having long spent her time mourning an unrequited love. In the year 1800, the then nineteen-year-old had made the acquaintance of Ferdinand Beneke, who would later become a celebrated Hamburg jurist. A friendship blossomed between them, which, on Thusnelda’s part, deepened into love. She believed her affection was returned; Ferdinand Beneke, however, was enamored of another—albeit unhappily.
When, in 1802, another suitor fell ardently in love with Thusnelda, she seized the opportunity to send timid signs of her affection to Ferdinand Beneke. Hoping that the presence of a serious marriage candidate—and thus a potential rival—would spur him into action to finally declare his love, she took him into her confidence and sought his friendly counsel. At the same time, as Ferdinand Beneke notes in his diaries, she offered him an "unusual handshake," ensuring he could not fail to perceive "that she prefers another (…)—and if vanity does not blind me, I am that very other!"[1]
Thusnelda’s calculations, however, proved futile; Ferdinand Beneke advised his friend to wed the other man. In her bitter disappointment, Thusnelda declared to her parents that she would not marry the potential suitor.
In the years that followed, Thusnelda suffered in silence, continuing to love Ferdinand Beneke—who had withdrawn from her after this incident—in the innermost recesses of her heart. She looked upon no other men during this time, until suddenly, in 1805, she married the "fifty-year-old, sickly, shriveled, and misshapen H."[2] von Hess.
Beneke remarked upon this: "But what inner state could drive a young girl from the great world into the arms of H. von Hess, which is to say, into a convent? Feminine romantic Don Quixotism, wild enthusiasm? But what can excuse the honorable Hess? She must have proposed to him. It is not possible otherwise."[3]
How profound must Thusnelda Hudtwalcker’s insecurity have been, that three years after her timid attempt to show her love to a man had failed, she would marry a man she did not love? With Ludwig von Hess, she possessed at least the certainty that he would not reject her—a balm to her wounded self-esteem.
By Garten der Frauen e.V. www.garten-der-frauen.de
Sources
[1] Hamburg State Archives: Beneke Family. Cited from: Anne-Charlott Trepp: "Denn das ist gerade meine Wonne …, dass Du mich wie ein kluges, denkendes Wesen behandelst" ("For that is precisely my delight…, that you treat me as a clever, thinking being"). Women and Men in the Hamburg Bourgeoisie between 1770 and 1840 – Questions and Findings. In: Hamburg Working Group for Regional History. Communications, November 29, 1996.
[2] Ibid.
[3] Ibid.
Translated from the original German text published on this website in 2018.
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